Do You Speak Dressage?

Subtitle: Are you a dressage nerd?

Sometimes I'll be talking to my friends about dressage, and they'll glaze over. I know - how can that be when the latest nuance of my 20 m circle is cliff hangingly riveting?
Okay. I get it. Dressage, especially lower level dressage, is about as interesting as watching paint dry to a non dressage person. The fact that no detail is too small to provide endless happy hours of discussion among dressage people is missed on the unconverted.
Aside from that, we also have a language that is incomprehensible to non dressage people. Just for fun (how dressage nerdy is that - I find this fun), I started coming up with a list of words and phrases we use, in the English language, that have an incomprehensible meaning to non dressage people. Some are used by other disciplines, some are specific to dressage. Here's my list:

• in front of the leg
• behind the leg
• half halt
• free walk
• up hill
• on the bit
• round
• track up
• three track
• shoulder in
• the double
• behind the vertical
• lunge
• leg yield
• circus
• poodle dressage (I just came across this one)
• half pass
• button braids
• knee blocks

That's what quickly comes to mind. There should be a dictionary for people starting dressage. I had no idea what most of this meant when I started, and I'm sure there's tons more I don't know. It can lead to embarrassing questions, ie a new competitor asked the judge at one of our recent shows, after reading the comments, if it was the rider or the horse who should be round. While others had a chuckle, I can totally see this. Who would know if their trainer hadn't explained it yet? To be honest, some of the terms are somewhat ephemeral concepts that have different twists to different people, but that's a whole new topic. As is the language of instruction, i.e. 'brace your back', 'retard the hands', 'irritate the hind leg', ...Don't get me started!
Here are a few sentences to leave non dressage people scratching their heads (don't hesitate to throw our a few when trapped by a bore):

1. She's doing third so she can use the double, but her trainer wants her schooling for more up hill first.
2. When half halts didn't get him on the bit I tried some lateral work, focusing on shoulder in and even moving to four track at times.
3. The reitmeister says Spanish walk is circus, but don't tell the baroque crowd.
4. He was over tracking by a foot in his free walk.
5. The frame was too strung out and he was running on his forehand throughout the test.

Trust me, none of the above makes a lick of sense to anyone outside your horse circle and will get you out of almost any less than happy social situation. People who speak this language alot may not even realize they do it. True story - when my teacher Joan called roadside assistance for a flat tire, she told them it was the outside hind :) Do you have any words or phrases to add to the list? I may just do the dictionary...
Now, God help me, I must go do something useful.